Thursday, April 15, 2010

Mine

I couldn't feel more like Noah Maxx is my flesh and blood. It's kinda neat and weird.

It first really dawned on me how much my brain was thinking he's mine when I was watching some show on genealogy and ancestry and it was more than half way over when I realized that technically, my family isn't his ancestors.

Our families are very different, especially when it comes to communication and emotions, but mine is almost more excited about us having a baby than hers is. Ever since my nephew was born almost 9 years ago, we've joked that my Mom is a granny monster, and doesn't care how she gets another grandbaby. Although when we called and told them it was a boy she said, "You got it wrong, but that one back and get another" because they were so hoping for a granddaughter this time.

I've been so blessed that pretty much from day one they've treated Nerdstar like family. My nephew calls her "MY Nerdstar". When his class at school talked about family members in the military, he took a pic of her in uniform to school. We laugh at the image of this little boy who couldn't be any more white with his strange Asian "aunt".

I also tend to forget that there's no way in this world he can look like me. In fact, we can't begin to imagine what he's going to look like because he's White/Asian, and there weren't even baby pics of the donor online. (Nerdstar didn't really realize this when she picked him.) I just know that those Chines genes are very strong, so it's not likely he'll be freckled and red-headed.

That's my little boy growing in there.

I know we're not a conventional family, but I feel like we're one. I know in some ways it'll always be weird that he doesn't have a dad. I was looking at info on getting his social security number the other day and the form asks for the numbers of both parents. (Thankfully, there's an "unknown" box you can use.) But that's when I realized it is pretty uncommon to not even know who the father is. And filling out such forms might always be weird for Noah. And while I'm sorry there are things he'll have to deal with - I'm so glad we're going to have him.

3 comments:

PixieFlute said...

Speaking as someone who was adopted as a baby, and looks nothing like the southern Italian half of my family, it doesn't matter. I couldn't feel any more like a part of my family, both sides, if I had been born to my mom. I'm very much into genealogy right now, and especially the Italian half of things; that's my family, that's my heritage and my connection, the blood or not just simply doesn't matter. It's who I am and how I was raised. The saying that love makes a family really is true.

Beth said...

Thanks Pixie!!

Melissa said...

Noah is very lucky to have the 2 of you as well. You're going to be a great mama to him.